Update!

Heyy, so i've been really busy but im not actually sure how, these past couple of days i've been rushed off my feet, doing what exactly im not sure, just trying to meet peoples demands i guess. I've enjoyed being "busy" it meant less time to sit around and think too much.

I've not been sleeping properly Every night for a few weeks i've been wide awake and having to force myself to lay down and attempt to sleep. Its been getting to the point where im still awake to hear my dad's alarm ringing for work at 5am, like this morning, then eventually falling asleep and being woken only a few hours later to get ready for work.

I've been spending to much time at the pub, and im sick of it, i'll be back around there tomorrow to "celebrate" a friends first ever job... trips to the pub come around so often that i can name the bar staff, someof the bar staffs family, I've even learnt a bit about the locals, my favourite being a man who moved down from up north who often joins me outside for a cigarette and makes small talk with me, im yet to remember his name, but i'll get it eventually.

Yesterday i heard some sad news about our new neighbours, and feel as if i could have done something to help... A few weeks ago after coming home at the early hours of the morning from a night on the town I heard what sounded like my neighbours doing a bit of D.I.Y, it sounded like somebody was hammering things, soo i just thought of it as nothing and went inside to bed.. Well yesterday i was talking to the little old lady who lives next door and it turns out the hammering sound was in fact her husband trying to get her attention as he had taken a fall from the bed and was loosing a lot of blood, she mentioned something about blood poisioning.. I felt so sorry for her, a little old lady all alone with her disabled son, i've given her my phone number and told her if she needs anything to just give me a call and i'll be there as soon as i can. Well today she was in her front garden and i asked her how she was and also how her husband is doing. He's allowed to come home in the next few days but she said he wont get better.. its so sad to think they've spent most of their life together and well, and from what my dad tells me, the old man doesn't have long left.. It's heartbreaking!

Today at work I met primarks new christmas employees, I was given a supervisors job, and asked to help train some of the people on the tills, Soo there i was with two extremely shy employees, Lewis and Katie. It bugs me how they give me supervisors jobs but wont actually train me to be a supervisor!! Well i threw Lewis and Katie in at the deep end and after showing them how the tills worked, i stood behind them and supervised whilst they served customers.. They were quick to learn and were serving the customers like pros quite quickly.  I doubt tomorrow will be as good, I'll either be on the tills or stuck in the stock room folding a variety of different sized and coloured towels! Lunch is always at 11:30, the early lunch, its meant to be on a rotational system so we take turns getting the early lunch however it seems this doesnt apply anymore and im always sent off at 11:30 to buy my bottle of water a milky way bar and pack of crisps. Lunch lasts for half an hour, and it has to be the slowest half an hour of my life sitting on a bench in the pentagon watching the people pass me by.

For the first time in a long time take away night isn't happening, mum and dad are having fish-finger sandwhiches (disgusting) im cooking a baguette and plan to put some of my quorn stuff in it. I had a big lunch and feel uncomfortable with having a propper diner so i'll stick with something small and have a snack later if i feel like it.

Things have been going pretty well with food, I've been putting up a fight, not always coming out the strongest but i'm doing okay. I don't weigh myself obsessively anymore, i dont want to know what im gaining. I have a doctors appointment on wednesday, where they've mentioned doing various different tests.
X-factor will be on soon, Mary Byrne MUST Win. If not Mary then Katie. Wagner needs to get the hell outta there!! He drives me insane, kind of reminds me of someone, but im not sure who lol.

Ohh, and i've found a few new favourite songs: Glitter in the Air, by Pink. Also loving Mary J Blige at the moment and I'll chuck a bit of Beyonce in there too.

I'm addicted to a game on facebook, i never usually play the games on there but CSI,not only an amazing tv series but a cool fb game too lol. Which reminds me, i have a murder to solve, Cynthia was murdered last night im guessing it was either her agent or her agents husband, they both seem to give me reason to be suspicious of them haha!!

Anywayss, im outta here, i've a crime to solve and dinner to make ;)

Mwahh <3 x x